A poem by Carol Dorman (copyright 2004)

I'm glad to be single and there's no denying
the joy of no debts and no strings and no trying
to contrive a way to avoid looking desperate
as I offer him love and yet never expect it.

I'm glad to be single and it's a sure fact
that my life is so full, I've no room for a cat
lest my time be diverted from service and love
given freely to others, storing treasures above.

I'm glad to be single and used by the Lord
single minded to follow his excellent word
I could live for myself, for my kids or my man
but to this I was called and by this I shall stand.

I'm glad to be single and I'm ready to go
to the ends of the earth in the sun or the snow
with a backpack or suitcase in a plane or a car
to encourage God's people wherever they are.

I'm glad to be single in spite of wed women
whose misguided pity so often will lead them
to infer that mine is so sad a condition
and presume I am faking this joy that I live in.

I'm glad to be single and please understand
that my love is for God (not my lust for a man)
and the lessons I've learned in these years of aloneness
have strengthened my faith unto patience and wholeness.

Are you glad you are married? Did you wait or rush in?
Do you wish you were single, starting over again?
Is your prince less than royal and your castle a barn?
Has your dream expectation lost it's fairy tale charm?

Be content where you are and be glad you are married
for upon that sad day when your prince you have burried
you will see with new eyes how our Lord can sustain
every single who loves Him and honors his name.

I'm glad to be single, just like my sweet Jesus
who lived and who died and who rose up to teach us
that singles and marrieds must walk humbly by
until He calls us home to our place in the sky.

Provocation from the author:

On Dating

Being glad that I'm single isn't the same as rejecting marriage or prospects. If it were, I would have written a very different poem. No, being glad to be single is about respecting the reality that we all experience singleness in our lives at different times and it's an honorable condition of life. The idea that singleness must be escaped at all costs is dangerous nonsense and springs from a youthful fear of the unknown combined with an unspoken hunger for power and influence. Let's face it, in modern culture respect is in short supply but people still respect married people just for being married. We'd all like a piece of that, wouldn't we?

I have met many single men who simply haven't found the right nice lady who will respect his dreams and goals. But what they don't often realize is that the reverse is often true. I have been asked out by a variety of decent and honorable men who seemed surprised to discover that God had a plan for my life...one that couldn't be over-ruled by a mortal's wishes. After we reach a certain age, it's not enough to share general values & culture. The question becomes: "Hey, hansome! Going my way?"

There are times in our adult lives when we find outselves between jobs, between ministries or between cities and those are the moments when romance has a chance. Change is just around the corner! Are you willing to start a new chapter and play the game differently? Maybe not. Maybe you don't even want to clean your kitchen much less all those relationship cobwebs of your mind. If so, you need a more robust philosophy of singleness, I think. Here is a version of my poem for those with nothing to learn and no room to grow. I hope it shakes you up.